Posted on September 03 2020
I welcomed our perfect twin boys into the world via c-section at the start of April... right amidst the covid-19 virus peak.
Bringing a baby into the world at any time has its challenges, but having twins during a global pandemic has made me feel a whole range of emotions and out of everything I thought I might feel, feeling cheated is the one that stands out.
I knew having twins with a toddler in tow wasn't going to be that serene, perfect new born bubble I felt with my son 3 yrs ago, but I'd worked really hard to make sure our son was settled in anticipation of the new arrivals. He was enjoying his new nursery, he was going to grandparents on specific days and we'd started some new classes to enjoy together on the days he was at home. All done in the hope that when his twin brothers came along he wouldn't have chance to feel pushed out. So when the plug was pulled and lockdown announced 2 weeks before I was due to give birth I felt as if all the preparation had been for nothing. His 24/7 entertainment was on me now and we had no garden at the time, no family to help, I was so heavily pregnant that I could barely move far enough to tire him out anymore on a walk, parks shut and my husband was a key worker and not at home to help. I felt like I was drowning in a wave of mum guilt, exhaustion and paranoia about everything.
Once the twins arrived, these feelings only intensified ten fold. It was mentally one of the hardest things I've had to deal with, especially with crazy hormones.
So here's to all you lock down mamma's, mamma's to be and new mamma's I see you - keep going, you got through lockdown, you can get through anything.
How did you all cope with lockdown pregnancies / giving birth? Did anyone else feel the same?